Must the Winter Come So Soon?

A long time ago, when I was a voice major at a lovely little midwestern university, I sang a lot of opera.

Then I went for a long time where I did only musical theater. I love musical theater- probably more than opera if I had to pick one- but something in me can't stop thinking that I have to prove I can still hang with the opera crowd. So I'm auditioning this weekend. I've just finished 3 shows in (practically) a row, so at least I've been singing. I wouldn't have tried this otherwise.

I dusted off a couple of pieces that I think I can pull off reasonably well. If I get cast, it will be gravy. I'm just hoping to finish the audition without making a fool of myself. I haven't quite come out and said so, but I almost think that if this fails, I won't try again. I'll admit I am really nervous. I only found out about the audition last week, so I had to make a decision fast.

The title of this post is one of my arias. It's beautiful and sad; by the American composer Samuel Barber from his opera "Vanessa." I plan to lead off with this one. It's about living in a place where the winters are so long, where "neither dawn nor sunset marks the passing of the days." But when I sing it, it has a new meaning for me. For me, "winter" is growing older, changing, having fewer options, feeling like life may have passed you by. I don't want that winter to come. I hope that when I sing it I can bring some of that longing and sadness to bear and let it show in the song.

The other piece is totally different- it's classic Mozart; one of Cherubino's arias from Figaro- the ebullient "Non so piu cosa son cosa faccio." I think it will a great contrast to the Barber. I plan to begin on the third page because I won't sacrifice anything by leaving the opening out; plus I'd rather not be cut off for time. That can really throw you. I'd rather choose to sing less of the song and be in control of my time. Cherubino is a boy played by a mezzo and he is just a silly love-struck goofball, so I hope I am relaxed enough to be playful and show a lot of personality.

Now, I will let you in on a secret: I am not a mezzo. But I know lots of sopranos sing "Non so piu" so it's sort of on the fence. I will grant you that the Barber is hands-down a mezzo piece. So why am I singing them? The truth is, I could not find any soprano arias I felt comfortable enough to have ready in a week. So maybe it's a cop-out. Maybe it's fear. Whatever.

I've been listening to Frederica Von Stade's recording of the Mozart and Denyce Graves' version of the Barber. I love Von Stade and think I can employ some of the little stylistic things she does to good effect. I will never sound like Denyce; her voice is one of those big warm velvety mezzos that just pours out and fills the room. But this aria won't be disserved by my lack of that type of tone quality. I think I'll more than do it justice. I'm going to do some nice things with dynamics to (hopefully) add some pathos.

Wish me luck!